YOU KNOW I WAS DOING SO WELL, NOT HAVING ANY BAD ATTITUDES AND SUCH, BUT THEN LIFE HAPPENED. I HAVE A HARD TIME LIVING OUTSIDE OF MY EMOTIONAL MIND. I FIGHT DAILY FOR A WISE MIND. AND IF ANYONE OF YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH DBT THERAPY YOU WILL TOTALLY GET WHAT I'M SAYING. BUT I'M A GEMINI AND AM THE YOUNGEST IN MY FAMILY, SO I THINK IT IS JUST A GIVEN I'M GOING TO HAVE AN ATTITUDE. I SPEAK MY MIND BUT SOMETIMES THAT IS NOT A GOOD THING, AND SOMETIMES IT IS.
I STARTED A JOB A WEEK AGO IN A LITTLE LOCAL DINER/BAKERY. I'VE ONLY WORKED FOR A SMALL COMPANY ONCE AND SWORE I WOULD NEVER DO IT AGAIN. BUT MY HUSBAND AND I MET FOR LUNCH ONE DAY, AND WE DECIDED TO GO TO THIS LITTLE DINER IN OUR SMALL TOWN. THE OWNER TOLD ME SHE WAS LOOKING FOR HELP AND I HAPPILY OFFERED MY SERVICES BUT I HAD TO PRAY ABOUT IT FIRST. I PRAYED AND SOUGHT THE LORD'S ADVISE FOR 2 DAYS. AFTER THOSE 2 DAYS, I DECIDED THAT GOD WANTED ME TO BE THERE. SO I STARTED WORKING THERE.
I LOVE THE FACT THAT I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS AND THAT THE OWNER IS LISTENING TO ME. SHE IS STILL RUNNING IT LIKE SHE WANTS BUT SHE LET ME DO WHATEVER JOB I WANTED, SO I DECIDED TO BE THE HEAD CHEF. I DIDN'T REALIZE WHAT A HARD JOB THAT IS. BUT I'M LEARNING AND HOPEFULLY ONE DAY WILL BE IN MANAGEMENT. THAT IS EVERYONE'S GOAL, AT LEAST THAT IS WHAT I'M TOLD.
BUT WORKING HARD LIKE THIS, MAKES IT HARD FOR ME TO "REGULATE" MY MIND. THAT IS MY TROUBLE.
I AM WANTING TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS JOB LIKE NOW! I'M VERY HARD ON MYSELF AND I NEED TO EASE UP AND BE KIND TO MYSELF. I HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT I HAVE NOT BEEN TRAINED AND THAT I AM A USEFUL EMPLOYEE. MY EMOTIONAL MIND IS EXPECTING ME TO KNOW EVERYTHING, AND TO REGULATE THOSE FEELINGS I NEED MY PUT MY DBT THERAPY INTO USE. I'M NOT GOING TO KNOW EVERYTHING AT ONCE AND ESPECIALLY WITHOUT BEING TAUGHT. I ALSO NEED TO LOVE MYSELF AND PUT ME FIRST. SO THAT IS MY FAULT AND I HAVE TO TAKE THIS JOB INTO SECTIONS. HOPEFULLY SOMEDAY I'LL GET IT!
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