Do you ever notice how your relationship with God can be a come and go thing? At least mine is at times. I hate it when I allow "life" to get in the way of my priority with God. And I know that God has plans for me. He has shown them to me but I'm scared. That's right, I'm not afraid to say it.
I know what I'm to do for God, but I'm afraid to do it. He has been training me for it, and now He has shown me. God can't get much clearer than He already has, but I'm frozen in fear. I know that fear is the devil working, but that doesn't make it any easier for me to get up and move. I'm struggling with, "What happens if I am a success?" Then people will depend on me and what happens if I let them down? I am so afraid of that responsibility!
I have seen people do things in the "Name of the Lord" and hurt many people along the way. I personally have been let down by many people who stated that they were led by the Lord to help me. But that is me putting my trust in man and not in God. And that is exactly what we are not to do. We are to rely on God and not man for our comfort and direction. Sometimes we get that confused. For example, a Pastor deceives his congregation. Some may blame God and not the Pastor. They'll say that we are "bitter" towards the church because of what a pastor may have done. That's putting your faith and trust in a man (the pastor) and not in God.
In order for me to do what God wants me to do I would have to change my life. I would have to put others before the troubles in my life. I don't know if my family could handle that. But maybe that is exactly what they need. I can't continue to debate about this, because I believe it is urgent that I do what God wants me to do. I'm on a mission from God!
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